I feel really lonely and I can't talk to anyone. Or at least, no one wants to talk to me. I feel like I'm being annoying and everyone thinks I am a total psycho. I feel unbalanced and out of sync. I feel like everyone is having an awesome time of things except for me, and I can't complain about it to anyone because who cares? These feelings are very abstract, and my best friends are not willing to pull me up when I feel down. Do I ever help anyone when they feel like this? I don't know. Maybe I can't do the sympathetic thing either. I just feel really isolated and pathetic and sad and like I want to cling to people so they will sense what I need from them and instead I'm just reminded that they don't feel how I feel and their lives are busy and full and there's no room for me if I'm not willing to elbow my way in.

I feel shitty and mad that no one notices and I swear I try to put good things out in the world but nothing seems to come of it. I hate this feeling.